Post by Acelix on Jul 20, 2009 7:57:06 GMT -8
So this is my latest story (an anime crossover) and I want you opinion if the case seems to Cliche as well as I'd like to share it with you...
It was an average day at the Moore residence/office, which is to say, nothing big was going on, that is, until phone rang. Richard answered it no different than he normally would.
“Moore detective agency how can I help you?”
The voice on the other end was jumbled,
"Richard Moore. I request you help. I am L. I have reached a stall in the Kira case, and have moved on to another pressing matter. It's become much more than I was expecting and would appreciate it if you could come over to our center of operations and help me. Should you accpet."
"Right I'll be there." He then hung up the phone then yelled. "Racheal start packing!"
"What!" She cried back.
"You heard me, Start packing, for the three of us."
Three of us? Something's got him pretty upbeat, or else he wouldn't be bringing me. Conan kept thinking about it the rest of the day and until the next day.
They were in front of the office when a small limo pulled up.
They got in and the first thing Richard did was plop down, but Racheal and Conan got to looking around. Suddenly a voice was heard forma shady area at the front of the car.
"Sorry for the delay. I needed a few things for the drive."
All eyes shifted to the man they thought was the driver. He had jet black hair that made it look like he'd just gotten out of bed, but the dark bags under his eyes said otherwise. He was dressed simply in jeans and an off-white tee-shirt. "I am L."
L! Conan was surprized. Isn't he's the world's greatest detective? What's he doing in the limo?
"So Mr. Moore, since I'm here I'd like to breif you on our case."
So that's it! He must have read somewhere about Richard and wanted his help with something.
L procceeded to grab a piece of cake out of the mini fridge, and then sat so he was facing Richard.
"There's been a chain of kidnapping murders. Several children and teenagers usually recently turned having turned, or soon turning 10, 13, or 18. No ransom is asked for, and about a month later the body appears on the doorstep. The taskforce if already busy with the Kira case, working despite the stall. So that's why I called you here." As L finished the minnor deatils Conan listened carefully, looking up at the man siting in his odd manner, when his head swung to look at Conan. "You look kind of familiar. Is there anyway I could have seen you before?"
"Who? Me? No way! I'm just a kid!" Is he onto me. This is not good!
L just shrugged and replied, "I guess you're right."
Scene One: Pilot
It was an average day at the Moore residence/office, which is to say, nothing big was going on, that is, until phone rang. Richard answered it no different than he normally would.
“Moore detective agency how can I help you?”
The voice on the other end was jumbled,
"Richard Moore. I request you help. I am L. I have reached a stall in the Kira case, and have moved on to another pressing matter. It's become much more than I was expecting and would appreciate it if you could come over to our center of operations and help me. Should you accpet."
"Right I'll be there." He then hung up the phone then yelled. "Racheal start packing!"
"What!" She cried back.
"You heard me, Start packing, for the three of us."
Three of us? Something's got him pretty upbeat, or else he wouldn't be bringing me. Conan kept thinking about it the rest of the day and until the next day.
They were in front of the office when a small limo pulled up.
They got in and the first thing Richard did was plop down, but Racheal and Conan got to looking around. Suddenly a voice was heard forma shady area at the front of the car.
"Sorry for the delay. I needed a few things for the drive."
All eyes shifted to the man they thought was the driver. He had jet black hair that made it look like he'd just gotten out of bed, but the dark bags under his eyes said otherwise. He was dressed simply in jeans and an off-white tee-shirt. "I am L."
L! Conan was surprized. Isn't he's the world's greatest detective? What's he doing in the limo?
"So Mr. Moore, since I'm here I'd like to breif you on our case."
So that's it! He must have read somewhere about Richard and wanted his help with something.
L procceeded to grab a piece of cake out of the mini fridge, and then sat so he was facing Richard.
"There's been a chain of kidnapping murders. Several children and teenagers usually recently turned having turned, or soon turning 10, 13, or 18. No ransom is asked for, and about a month later the body appears on the doorstep. The taskforce if already busy with the Kira case, working despite the stall. So that's why I called you here." As L finished the minnor deatils Conan listened carefully, looking up at the man siting in his odd manner, when his head swung to look at Conan. "You look kind of familiar. Is there anyway I could have seen you before?"
"Who? Me? No way! I'm just a kid!" Is he onto me. This is not good!
L just shrugged and replied, "I guess you're right."
